| Sunday, November 12, 2006 |
| Okayama Guardians: We are volunteer staff. |
What we need is more crime. Or, at the very least, more crime-stoppers. Okayama already has useless police boxes on every corner. The new parking gnome patrol is on red alert, looking for cars that are obstructing... nothing. But it's not enough! We need something catchy and sexy and we want to be on television. There must be a way can we create some kind of "NYPD Blue" magic in Okayama, but how? Hey, wait a minute! Who are those strapping men in red windbreakers? Police? Rent-a-cops? No, they're the dorks on Hall Patrol that used to threaten you with lunch detention in junior high! But now they're all grown up and they call themselves...
OKAYAMA GUARDIANS: We are volunteer staff.
Exhibit 1: Guardian A enters phone booth. Guardian B holds door and watches for trouble. Four Guardians hold down the sidewalk. Guardian A tears down phone-sex ad taped to the glass and stuffs it into a garbage bag. Guardian B shouts something, Guardian A emerges. Guardian pack continues to next phone booth, light sabers blazing.
Exhibit 2: Phone booth clear, Guardians spot hooligans sitting on the sidewalk playing guitars. They are not panhandling. They are not inebriated. They are not obstructing traffic. They have exactly two fans. They are content. THEY MUST BE STOPPED. This is the moment, boys: can you smell blood in the water? Guardians, "Jaws" formation, GO!
Guardian D: Whoa there, sport. Is that a KISS song you're playing?
Busker: No, sir, it's SMAP.
Guardian: Mmm hmm. Four letter band-name, subversive lyrics... I thought I heard a bit of Gene Simmons and you know that kind of trash isn't allowed in the Land of Sunshine.
Busker: SMAP isn't even a word, it's an acronym. And they're like the Backstreet Boys of Japan, except they'll never ever ever be famous anywhere else but here. And what the hell is a Gene Simmons?
Guardian: Carry on.
We are volunteer staff. |
posted by Raychaa @ 10:25 PM  |
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OKAYAMA GUARDIANS: We are volunteer staff.
It's not quite Miami Vice, but it could lead to a series about the work the team does saving troubled youths from a life of busking and illegal cycling.
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Name: Raychaa
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About Me: “No man, not even a doctor, ever gives any other definition of what a nurse should be than this - 'devoted and obedient'. This definition would do just as well for a porter. It might even do for a horse. It would not do for a policeman.” (Florence Nightingale)
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OKAYAMA GUARDIANS: We are volunteer staff.
It's not quite Miami Vice, but it could lead to a series about the work the team does saving troubled youths from a life of busking and illegal cycling.